May Flowers

April's goals:

• host a book party for Adrienne!--the book was read, my house was clean, the cake was fabulous, and much fun was had by all. Who cares if I had planned for us to eat home cooking on the patio? (The patio set was a shambles and we ordered in.) Big picture people. And it was fabulous meeting Adrienne.
  
• camp!--I love when I put easy things on the list. I went. I saw. I conquered.
  
• work on the marquoir--I undid last month's work. At least I am touching it regularly.
  
• work on WIP Lilybet's Spot Sampler II--fait accompli!
• work on WIP Hillside Sampling's Folk Art Threadkeep--I have finished the lettering. (Close up below.)
  
• work on class quilt--There were a couple of classes to which I showed up embarrassingly late. Fortunately this is adult school not regular school, and I was not kicked out of the class. Though perhaps I should have been because two of my strips of squares were so "off" that I had to resew them. At camp, I found a fantastic flannel version of one of the fabrics I used on the front--and bought it all. Nothing like having a cuddly cozy flannel backing. Love!

May Goals:

• keep stitching the threadkeep
• keep stitching on the marquoir
• make something for my dad's birthday**
• start an anniversary present for the dude
• class quilt

** The reason I chose the two Vegas charts is that it is my father's favorite place on earth. He might be going soon, if you catch my meaning.

Camp Conclusions

I finished stitching the birthday sampler on Sunday.

I can't wait for my father's 70th birthday in June. I am so bringing this to the party to put at his place! Funnily enough, the next three birthdays are my cousin's husband, my dad's, and the dude's. I'm sure they're going to love having this one as their dinner place card!

Speaking of my father's 70th birthday, I need a gift. I was thinking of making a scrapbook like I did for my fil's 70th. I was also thinking of doing one of the projects I bought in Vegas lo these many moons ago. I could do the Las Vegas Welcome sign as a keepsake box or I could do the M Designs "Las Vegas tree" (you know those trees--words written sideways, mirror images) and have it framed.

If I can finish it in the next few weeks I can take it to the Strawberry Sampler framing sale.

Let's make a poll.

I completed the stitching on the quaker heart from camp as well. Now to get to the finishing.

What I'm Up To

Joining: I've recently joined two book groups at the local library. All those years in graduate school made me a bit of a snob about talking about books with regular people. But I am starting to feel like I might lose my head entirely if I don't find someone to talk about something with. I joined the Mystery Read Around (everyone reads a mystery from a similar area, rather than the same book) and the contemporary American fiction group. I've already bailed on the first meeting of the latter group. The first book was Dorothy West's The Wedding. It was so awful--some of the sentences were such clunkers they could not be borne--I couldn't finish it, and I don't want to be that member of the group!

Reading: The Trail of the Wild Rose for the mystery group. Next month we're discussing gardening mysteries. I suppose if there is such a thing as needlework mysteries, there's no reason not to have gardening mysteries. At least the tools are very dangerous. Plus, poison! (I don't know which get used yet.)

Stitching: Hillside Samplings, Folk Art Threadkeep. I think I might actually finish this one this year!

Hosting: Lily, the labradoodle down the street, stops in for play dates with Stella. It saves us $25 (each) because we don't have to bring our dogs to day care as often. They're adorable together. And I get to talk to her human for a little while.

Watching: High Stakes Poker, season Gabe Kaplan knows poker (he brings so much more to the table than ESPN's Norm Chad) and is funny to boot (Chad thinks misogyny is funny). And there is something so sexy about all that money on the table. And Gus Hansen.

Supporting: Animal Coalition of Delaware County. This is the group that hooked us up with Stella. I've recently started blogging for them, and tomorrow night I am going to dine out at Teikoku to support them. I can't wait until September: bingo! (in aid of the animals)

SEX in My Pajamas (Please Don't be a Dirty Person Looking for That)

On Saturday I got up at 6 am--that's before dawn--to get to the Strawberry Sampler for their sale. The earlier you arrived (beginning at 7 am) the bigger your discount. And if you wore jammies to the party, an extra percentage off. I was there in my hot pink plaid flannel pajama pants for the 25% off. I got just a little new stash--I still had part of my Christmas gift certificate:

Cat's Whiskers "What a Hoot"

Hands to Work "Love, Me" (and the Crescent Colours to stitch it)

Primitive Needle, Moon Sicke

CHS, A Mind Independent and Free

CHS, Curse of the Raven (on the $1 table!)

CHS, Sarah Spurr (also $1)

Mill Hill, Arctic Circle Santas*

Lizzie*Kate, Dog Lessons for People

JBW, Bunny Collection (love that Liberty-style bunny!)

Three large pieces of fabric: Lakeside Meadow Rue 40ct, Picture this Plus Heritage 40 ct, Lakeside Autumn Gold 32 ct

a gift for a friend (not pictured)

I still have $6 on the gift certificate, and this is the second spending spree I've had with it! I'm going to have to tell my mother it was too big! ;)

Of course, it's not like I didn't buy anything at camp. I just haven't shown it to you yet:

Ten (!) Belle Soie silks for the Bermuda pattern I bought to stitch for the dude

CHS, Friendship sampler

Shepherd's Bush, Blue Snowman kit

Tournicoton, Chicken Love

Yes, not as much as usual, even though I had a gift certificate. Mostly because I knew about the pajama sale but also because it's hard to justify spending with the current job situation.

*This is the second time I've bought those Mill Hill kits. Free shipping if you'll pay full price for them...

MMX

This is my first finish of MMX. Not my first finish of 2010, mind you. At camp, we decided the year lent itself to Roman numerals. (So if last year's camp was about "the charm" and the year before was "all about freedom," this year was about the Roman numerals. Less imaginative perhaps, but pretty cool.)

I need to have a lot of finishes this year so I can sign them MMX. I am especially looking forward to 2030 (MMXXX, racy!).

I (almost) finished this at the library's morning craft circle today. Let me tell you the daytime craft circle has a much different feel from the evening craft circle. I was one of the young ones at evening craft circle, true, but these ladies, though delightful, are wicked old. (There were a few who wouldn't appreciate that, I'm sure.) There was another young woman there, but she's moving in a couple of weeks, of course. Why can't I make a stitching friend (from my hood) who's under 80? Okay, 60. Anyway, I'm bringing olives and cherry tomatoes for the going away salad bar, which means I'll attend for another two weeks at least.

All that talk of salad put me in the mood for a grilled Swiss on rye from Minella's. A woman at the counter and the waitress were talking about the wedding of the waitress's daughter. The woman turned to me and said she hoped her daughter eloped, then asked if I was married. She was shocked when I said yes because she "thought I was one of the college kids." (Minella's is near Villanova and Rosemont College and Harcum College and Bryn Mawr College and...you get the idea.) Her eyes must be bad because I have half inch roots that are silver. Anyway, it's a blessing and a curse. We did have a nice conversation though, which was a bonus.

Lilybet

Spot Sampler II

36 ct Meadow Rue, Lakeside Linen

NPI silks in jade (originally called for the crosses to be stitched in gold but I decided, nonbeliever that I am, that they shouldn't stand out any more than necessary)

Dilated

I have been having trouble with my eyes. I'm finding that I need more magnification when I stitch because it's hard to focus otherwise. And it's especially difficult to look up from my work and focus in the distance or even the middle distance. Since I was about 20, I've occasionally used glasses to correct my vision--I have one eye that sees near and one eye that sees far. I don't need glasses to see, but sometimes it works a little better with than without.

That's pretty much what the ophthalmologist told me today--I don't need to wear glasses but I could. But when I saw how much sharper I see in the near eye, I realized it's time. Of course, since I had to get progressive lenses (when did I get so effing old?) I couldn't get the cute Nine West pair (the lens needed to be bigger). I did resist the Pradas the technician showed me. I ended up with the Kate Spade Madelyn in olive tortoise. Because picking out new glasses when you have dilated pupils and no bff to give approval is just what you want to do.

The good news is that the doctor saw my stitching--and I was stitching 40 count over one with no magnification (though my arms were waving about like I was playing the trombone)--and told me that I had to see the embroidered quilts at the Perelman Building at the Philadelphia Museum of Art. I'm pretty sure he's right.

Okay, I've cooked dinner in my sunglasses. When will my eyes return to normal?

Say What?

Remember back on August 30, 2008, when I referred you to the red nylon line that was revitalizing the cross stitch industry? (Go back because the comments are hilarious.)

Well the joke is on us because the $7.50 $9 thread has won "Most Innovative Craft Product of 2010" from the Craft Hobby & Stitch International Show, "Europe’s number one trade show for the creative craft section" according to the press release.

In fact, the red nylon line cures depression and anxiety: "Stitchers who suffer from anxiety and depression are also finding this relaxing tool to be a positive influence in their struggle to overcome these personal problems."

I wish I could make this shit up.

Edited: Lee did research, folks. The only place this press release appears is on a press release agregator. There's no mention of it on the show website. I was wondering how something that came out in 2006 ends up winning in 2010. But then again, I was wondering how cross-stitchers didn't realize they could just use thread to grid too.

Camping? How About a List?

Just last week I was looking for a camp packing list. I've compiled one; the fact that I was at camp for four days is hardly a coincidence. I looked around, saw the things people had and made a list. Of course there's some amount of overkill in what people bring--matching t-shirts, table mounted cup holders, grapes--but here's a list that is a happy medium.

• clothes
• pajamas
• robe--or wear your bra all day long (see New Rule #1)
• hoodie or sweater
• slippers
• shower shoes
• shoes (nb: you can probably make do with two pairs--or even just one--for 4 days)
• stitching lamp
• stitching projects
• needles
• scissors
• laying tool
• do-lolly
• camera
• nail file
• hand wipes
• band aids
• hand cream
• toiletries
• ear plugs--or perhaps noise canceling headphones
• umbrella But face it: if it rains you will avoid the outside. Don't pack your trench coat (again).
• silk sleeping bag
• extra blanket (small fleece throw)

If you have a friend who lives near enough to drive, she could bring:

• water
• foot stool
• extra lamp for table center (helps light things up after the sun goes down)

I'm sure even after four days of list making, I've forgotten something. Put it in the comments; I'll pack it next year.

Camp Report, Version 8

D.D. and I have completed our 8th Camp Session. Fun as ever! Though the older I get the less sense it makes to stay up until 2 am three nights running. I can't help it! I had to in order to work on these projects:

Chessie and Me's Ewe Under the Willow, front (l) and back (r). This pattern encouraged a bit of friendly competition in the crowd. First D.D. thought of stitching grass and putting color in her tree. (You can hardly see it, but I've got some gold French knots in the tree--I thought needed to pull some of that color in since my wool was gold.) Then I decided to use a grassy color and stitch my initials. Then someone else stitched grassy initials forwards on the front and in reverse on the back! A couple of people at our table used beads instead of French knots to bring color to the tree. Lots of creativity on this one. (We also got those clay pins stuck in the pincushion. And a miniature wooden hornbook--scroll about halfway down.)

Samsarah, Happy Fun Day. Crazy colors starting with WDW Calypso (used for the lettering). Metallics, Frosty Rays, and Fyre Werks were provided for stitchers to choose. It was a gaudy buffet of threads. I had completed the words and then on Sunday morning decided it should say Happy Birthday rather than Happy Fun Day. One woman at our table used overdyed browns to make it a chocolate cupcake. She also only stitched the heart, the star, and the swirl (ie no confetti pieces) and it came out pretty; not as garish. Lots of people stopped by to photograph it. Still, I kind of like how fully over the top this piece is (will be). Totally not my usual thing. This will be finished as a flat fold, and I have the Magic by Mona kit to go along with it. Look for the finished goods in posts to come.

Fourth of July--Quaker Style by Aury who blogs at Acerca del Bordado, stitched in Belle Soie silks. This will be mounted on Week's Dye Works felt (I chose a dark blue houndstooth) and made into a pocket to hold the mother of pearl Kelmscott Heart Threadkeep. (But just a note: please, patriotic at every spring camp? People, I live with a Brit. He loves this country but you see how so much American flaggy business might be a bit much in our house? How about a Christmas in April piece? Please.)

I didn't get to this project at camp. I stitched this on my interminable journey home. (Left Tulsa at 2:00 pm for Houston. Left Houston at 6:50 pm, arrived Philadelphia 11:05. Collected my luggage and car and arrived home to a barking guard dog at 12:15 pm. Couldn't wait for my head to hit the Tempurpedic!) The Temple women's gymnastics team was on our very full flight home--you should be happy to have a gymnastics team on your very full flight. We had a little peanut of a girl in the middle seat. And she was sweet--took an interest in my stitching and in the needlepoint (Janlynn kit) of the woman on the aisle even though she's in college and has much more interesting things on her mind.

Lindy and Mona deserve special recognition this year. Not only were the projects adorable, every single one of them had all the materials you would need and more! Well done, ladies. For a minute, we worried. What would be the charm of our rustic camp if everything went smoothly?

Not to worry, I've come away with a serious case of stitch-ass. No joke, I feel like someone implanted a tennis ball in my left hamstring. I can't wait to go to Pilates tonight--I've been thinking about it since Saturday.

It did become clear this weekend that we may need to establish new camp rules. By now we've all internalized the basic rules: quiet in the hallways after people start going to bed, don't let your door slam, etc.

New Rule #1: BRA WEARING I know wearing a bra for 15 hours grows increasingly uncomfortable but we need to establish some kind of rule so we are not assaulted by old boobs after 11:00 pm. By all means, change into your pajamas but either keep your bra on or wear an extra layer so I don't have to see just how far gravity has taken things. A robe, perhaps? Not sure if you need it? If you can see the outline of a nipple, you need to cover up. The only person who wants to see that didn't come to camp with you.

New Rule #2: SNORING Attend a sleep clinic to establish whether you have a snoring problem. If you do, get treatment. If your next door neighbor (me) is listening to An English Lady Mass on the iPod and she can still hear you snoring (through the wall!), you've got a problem that needs medical intervention. Tomorrow, I'll be posting the packing list for future camps. On it you will find "earplugs." I am thinking, however, noise canceling headphones may be in order.

Okay, the only vegetables I ate in the last four days were deep fried pickles, I need to put some of this in me:

Street Cred

Cross-Stitch With Street Cred
Allison Tunis takes arts and crafts to the edge, celebrating female sexuality in cross-stitch

I wish I were more articulate. I wish I could better represent cross-stitch--not the straw man description of "cross stitch" that gets used as a basis for deciding that some people are doing "really innovative things" with our craft. (This also goes for The Girl on the Wall, which I find admirable and interesting but probably not nearly as unique as we are being led to believe.) I'm tired of being pointed to the seat by the grannies because what I'm doing is somehow trite and twee. I'm just so fucking sick of the belief that cross stitch is all teddy bears and country geese, unless it's about naked women, ejaculating penises, and the word fuck. (I'm not on the side of the people who are all "eww, ejaculating penises" either. Is there a middle ground?)

Visit Tunis's etsy shop where you can find cross stitch face that is neither family nor celebrity and thus even more perplexing to me. You cannot, however, find the bright purple vibrator. Now that was what I was looking for.

Tunis is probably a fabulously interesting woman at the center of this. It's just that other people are deciding what gets said about her. It's not really about her.

Interestingly enough, people who are old timey readers of rctn will remember that creepy old guy who used to cross-stitch naked women. I'm pretty sure he used 68 different colors of "thread" too. And then you wonder what's the difference between naked chicks stitched by an art school trained woman and naked chicks stitched by an old man ("outsider art"). There is a difference--for instance, one gets you covered in the news and on blogs--but there's not, you know? Again and again someone reinvents the wheel and others point and say "brilliant!" "Outside the box!" "Innovative and unique!" "Speaks for itself!"

Grr. Nothing, people, nothing at all, "speaks for itself." Just strike that from your vocabulary. The implication is that there is only one way to interpret something. Interpretation, however, is mired in ideology. If you think everyone would have your interpretation it's simply because you can't see beyond your own ideology. So fuck you. Wow. That felt good.

I've Got Nothing in Common with that Old Lady

This article proves that...anyone can be published. If you click through you can see the cross-stitched family face (much more understandable than the cross-stitched celebrity face) clumsily referred to in the last line.

My grandmother has roughly 25 framed items on her walls -- things like birds, buildings, beautiful scenery -- and they're all cross-stitched. I think this is something that just happens when you get older whether you want it to or not. One day you're shopping at Crate & Barrel, and the next your walls are covered in needlepoint. For what it's worth, though, none is awesomer (new word) than the 10-year-old Bryce complete with bowl cut.

Sadly, one friend who found out I was going to cross-stitch camp called it "Grannie Camp." The joke's on him: I'll never be a grandmother!

So two old lady references for the price of admission. Sigh.

Huffington

The Huffington Post delves into cross-stitch. Be sure to read the comments because the author gets slammed for mixing craft metaphors.

"Trust us when we tell you, these aren't the kinds of crafts you'd see in your grandmother's living room (unless, of course, you have a total badass for a grandma, in which case a congratulations are in order). "

Still with the grandmothers? Giant eye roll. I'm sorry, people, I lost count.

Jet Plane

Phew. Last week, I only let myself think as far as Thursday. And then starting Friday, I focused on Sunday, when I had the family over for dinner--including my cake-baking cousin whose birthday is today and my sister's new boyfriend who has the palate sophistication of a ten year old. (But he makes my sister happy.) We had to keep the house clean, set a menu fit for children and adults, and create an appropriate birthday dessert for the Cake Goddess. (I went with brownie sundaes using the leftover brownies from Thursday. Because a woman's got to know her limitations.)

I am leaving for camp at the crack on Thursday. And I've just started thinking about packing. I know it's going to be wet but warm.

Didn't I once make a list of everything a person should bring to camp? Where did that go?

Help me, people! What am I forgetting?

Post the Third

Last Monday, I finished "Thing 6" from my ill-fated Thing-a-Day foray.

Crescent Colours, "Swirlygirls."
GAST Shutter Green and Apple Green and some kind of WDW purple.
Fabric unknown.

I had to undo that one swirl not once or twice but three times. Just the one. But you know how we crafters can't count!

Post the Second

The other post that's been kicking around my head has to do with "process." Adrienne mentions this in her book, and we talked about it at the party too. Adrienne writes about being goal-oriented:

I am not a woman who enjoys process. I am a writer who does not enjoy writing. I can find innumerable ways to avoid it. But, to rip off Dorothy Parker, nothing else--nothing--gives me the same thrill as having written.

I'm the same way with knitting. The process is fine, mind you, and keeps my hands busy. But nothing else--nothing--gives me the rush that I get from finishing something.

She talked about it too in her interview, and if I were a more intrepid reporter, I would have dug a little deeper into her psyche: "I cross-stitch as well and know how you can find yourself fixated on a project that you just have to buy, stitch and frame--and that you can't really rest until it's done."

I thought I just wasn't very dedicated because I can't really name anything I am working on that "I can't really rest until it's done." I hadn't really thought of it before Adrienne gave a name to it, but I am completely a process stitcher. 100%. End up with a finished project or don't, I'm in it for the stitching. In fact, before I put up the stairway gallery, I had framed pieces that were just sitting in a pile. I do this thing to give my hands something to do. And while I'm working, the extra part of my brain is engaged in something that is not worrying, fretting, or crazy. Maybe I have ADD, and I control it by stitching.

There are occasionally projects that I don't love stitching, but those are usually things I've picked specifically to fit someone else's personality. I'm stitching for the love of the person. Anj gave this a name the other day; she said she was a gift knitter. It could be that I am a gift stitcher.

I won't ruin the end of the book for you, but suffice to say that Adrienne learns that she might be a process knitter after all. Welcome to the dark side, doll.

Adrienne's Salon

For the past few days, I've been writing to you in my head, dear reader. I've been avoiding the computer--or pretending to--in order to clean the house--or pretend to--in preparation for the "salon." (I love that; it seems so French and modernist and sophisticated. I like to pretend that I am sophisticated.) I have three posts but I am going to give them to you backwards, most recent first.

Adrienne's visit was a treat. About 13 people gathered in my tiny living room. The range in ages was great as were the geographical locations. Two women drove up from coastal Maryland (three hours) and of course Lee came all the way from Pittsburgh even if she pretended only to come from Philadelphia where she was visiting her mother. Mostly knitters, as you would expect, three cross-stitchers, a seamstress (better than a sewer), and a crocheter. And spinners! One woman spins directly from her rabbit. (I'm easy to impress.) We had a free-ranging discussion.

Adrienne asked me to remind her to take photos. So I took one. The woman in the pink is newly-famous Anj, the steek cutter. (If you took photos, have pity on Adrienne and me: please send.)

Adrienne herself is delightful. If I closed my eyes and squinted my ears, she reminded me of bestpal. They use some of the same phrases and have some of the same stances on things. Maybe we're kind of like planets and our gravity attracts certain kind of um, other planets into our universes. Okay that was a weird simile. But I think you get the idea.

Speaking of the "wrong voice," it was kind of funny to hear Adrienne read because when I read the book, I had a different voice in my head reading it to me. (Neither hers nor mine.) When I went to see Lorrie Moore read A Gate at the Stairs, she talked about having the character's voices in her head but not being able to replicate them when she read so she was always reading in the wrong voice. Yeah, I just compared myself to one of America's great short story writers. Something's gone to my head.

I would like to say that my brownies (a Katharine Hepburn recipe) or lemon bars were a hit, but my cousin's cake (pictured) stole the show. I should do a post on her cakes because she is so talented. She's our family Ace of Cakes. Only much prettier. And you never worry whether she'll make it in time. She's a good scheduler.

Speaking of scheduling...I couldn't hide my crazy for the whole time Adrienne was here, and I'm sorry to say that I actually waved a knife in her face while I was ranting about the casual understanding most people have of RSVPs. People, it's a commitment. You can't cancel the day of for vague reasons. (I probably would be a nicer person if I cut people more slack. But here's a thought, "I'd love to come to your party, but work is hectic this time of year. I'm going to have to say no." And then your host can say, "well, why don't you let me know on Wednesday how things look," if she's willing to be flexible. She gets to decide because she is doing the hard work, not you. Still you should be prepared to miss many a dinner party. "Maybe" simply isn't an option.)

In my defense, the knife was plastic.

Adrienne is a lovely guest who goes with the flow but uses remarkably little water. You should invite her 'round.

Put This in Your Easter Basket and Smoke It

From the wonderful wacky world of Philadelphia confections, I bring you my favorite Easter treat: Zitner's Butter Krak egg. (Like the Cadbury Egg, they disappear for 10 months out of the year.)

Photographic evidence.

Also, since I couldn't walk across the street to mail her present in a timely way (on that score the apple didn't fall far from the tree): Happy Birthday, Mom.

Oddest Book Title

According to the press release, the Diagram Prize for Oddest Book Title of the Year is an award conceived as a way to avoid boredom at the annual Frankfurt Book Fair. {via Go Fug Yourself} Frankly, I would have thought strolling the aisles of the world's largest book fair would have its own rewards. Instead, they have to make fun of the stitchers:

“I think what won it for Crocheting Adventures with Hyperbolic Planes is that, very simply, the title is completely bonkers. On the one hand you have the typically feminine, gentle and wooly world of needlework and on the other, the exciting but incredibly un-wooly world of hyperbolic geometry and negative curvature. In Crocheting Adventures with Hyperbolic Planes the two worlds collide—in a captivating and quite breathtaking way.

“One hopes that Dr Taimina’s win prompts other enlightened crocheters, knitters and embroiderers to produce similar works, so I look forward to seeing books such as Cross-stitching String Theory and Felting Feats with Phenomenology adorning bookshop shelves in the near future.”

I'm gonna cross-stitch them some string theory, but it ain't gonna be pretty.

March 32nd

I knew yesterday was the 31st, but for some reason it didn't occur to me that the end of the month had arrived. Apparently I was hoping for 34 days...

March goals:

• work on the marquoir (weather permitting)--I worked on it, but it was a little like Fred Flintstone driving his car. Lots of foot moving, no forward motion.
  
• work on two WIPS: Curtis Boehringer Apple Sampler and Heart's Content, Merry and Bright--I completed the Apple Sampler! and got about halfway on the border of Merry and Bright.
• work on class quilt--yes, I've cut out the entire quilt and stitched up 2/3 of the background.
  
• cut out more pieces for the 19dicketytwo quilt--alas and alack, it is still boxed up
  

I also finished Sea Bathing, did a couple of layouts, and read a book.

For April

• host a book party for Adrienne!
• camp!
  
• work on the marquoir
• work on WIP Lilybet's Spot Sampler II
  
• work on WIP Hillside Sampling's Folk Art Threadkeep
  
• work on class quilt

Check this out: Truckers who knit and quilt in their down time. It's no April Fool's joke. And what do you know? They do the work for many of the same reasons we do. One trucker says his work, "gives you a little bit of ownership. You've actually accomplished something with your time off." Do you think this will be the thing that shuts down the old lady count? Will it end the stereotypes?