Sunday, April 27, 2008

Craft Circle

I haven't yet reported on Thursday's craft circle, but it was pretty good. I arrived late because I had to gather everything for My Needle and Floss. When I walked in the room this older woman was describing the case of peritonitis for which she was treated in Mexico. I had a hard time imagining the circumstances under which this topic came up, but there you go. When I arrived it was one woman from last week's pair, the old woman with peritonitis, and a woman writing thank you notes. I introduced myself and got the name of the one woman I had met before wrong. But at least I called her her friend's name and not something totally random. Then the organizing librarian from last week swept into the room with a pile of cross stitch books for, oh, let's just call her Peri for short. Peri wanted to stitch snapdragons, and they began to search through a fairly impressive sampling of cross stitch books from the library. The thank you note woman usually scrapbooks, but she needed to get the notes out since her daughter's christening was last week. She has three children under four. She seemed nice and was interested in what everyone was doing. Our conversation ranged from patterns to polygamy, as you tend to. Peri was sad for the kids in the Yearning for Zion Ranch case because they'd never had "crowns." It took me a second, but then I remembered that's how Philadelphians say crayon. (When I was telling the dude this story, he couldn't understand my pronunciation of crayon (cran) making the whole story pointless.) It turned out that mom3's sister was married to a guy in a crazy-ass religion where she is virtually homebound. Which just sounds like torture to me. Also, since I was the only one not from Philadelphia there was a lot of talk of "what's not there anymore" like the automat and the children's clothing store that had a slide to the basement. Conclusion: shows promise.

When I returned home, I was flipping through the Needlecrafter's Travel Companion, and the dude was reading over my shoulder. We were making fun of some of the shop names because, well, it's like they don't understand how language works so the puns were meaningless rather than funny. (Also Stitch Niche doesn't work for us because we both say "neesh" which is French and therefore better and more correct.) We marveled at the number of stores that have substituted "stitch" for "hitch" prompting the dude to decide my hypothetical shop should be called "Alfred Stitchcock" which just sounds dirty. Then we came up with shop names:
  • Get Stitch or Die (Dye?) Trying
  • Quit Your Stitchin' (although it's a nice play on "bitch," I told the dude he had to be less negative)
  • Get Stitch Quick
  • Floss Leader
  • Knitters and Stitchers (although it's almost always pitchers and catchers linked together)
  • Relief Stitchers featuring the Wool Pen (for the cross-stitch/knitting shop)
  • Mme Defarge (good idea for a knit shop if you want to be on the FBI's watch list)
  • The Floss Floozy.
The last three were our favorites. There were lots more like Get Stitch or Dye Trying but I've spared you.


Anonymous said...

The Floss Floozy - definitely!


Adrienne said...

I lean toward Mme Defarge. The shop of my dreams would have both knitting and xstitching accouterments.

And the idea of 3 years under the age of 4 scares the heck out of me. It's a wonder she can string two words together.

monique said...

ROFL! Alfred Stitchcock, indeed.

Michelle said...

I'm so glad craft night went well. I vote for Alfred Stitchcock - but you know how I am.

Jenna said...

Alfred Stitchcock - what a hoot! I like The Floss Floozy, personally. ;)