Wednesday, June 12, 2013

Maggie--We Can't Wait for--Monday

My aunt sent me this note, and it struck me as funny. I just had to share. Also, it's been some time since we've visited the antics of this 91 year old determined to live on her own.


Maggie boiled over her lobster chowder on one of her burners  So not to let the microwave feel bad, she did the same in it. Since she didn't know how to pull out the drip pan to clean it, I told her to ask her housekeeper, Eva, to do it. When Eva was there yesterday, she said that all four burners had caked on gunk that was impossible to remove. She suggested getting new drip pans. Now to the best part. Remember that Maggie's kitchen was done over two or three years ago with all new appliances. Maggie says they must have given her a dirty, used stove because she never uses but the one burner and all the rest have dried gunk on them. Here's the kicker: It took her three years to notice!! I'm not arguing with her, it's not worth it. Her stove is by a company named "Summit". If Duane Rolfe wasn't in jail for beating his sister to death with a baseball bat, I would have gone to McDonalds to find an exact fit.* Jerry and I just picked up some replacements and hope they fit. We also bought the aluminum ones to cover the new ones in case someone breaks into her apartment and gunks up the new drip pans.

*No doubt this is horrifying, but this detail plopped in the middle of the story made me laugh out loud. (Because I am a horrible person.) McDonald's is a family owned kitchen shop in business since 1890 or so. Whenever new stock came in, they'd move the old stock further back in the store. It had everything. Break your grandmother's pyrex dish and need one to match the remaining lid? McDonald's. Need a percolator cord? McDonald's. Need a part for something you found in the thrift store? McDonald's. They always had everything you needed (and even shit you didn't). The store was piled to the rafters and they always knew where to find anything you asked about.

**That's just a photo of a stove from wikimedia commons, not the stove in question.

10 comments:

Chocolates4Breakfast (Terri Malinovich) said...

OMG, LMFAO!

Unknown said...

You are TOO FUNNY.. Thank you

Marcy said...

Too funny!! Thanks for the laugh.

Daffycat said...

Teeheeheehee!

Annie said...

What a riot! Your auntie has spunk!

MelissaD said...

Too funny! I like her spunk!
Reminds me of one of the homeowners my husband went to see on a new home warranty service call. They complained about the paint finish on their stove...umm turns out they hadn't cleaned it in several years....a kitchen scrubber, some SoftScrub and some effort cleaned up one of them - he told them they could clean the rest of the stove themselves :P

Jennifer said...

HA HA HA HA HA That would have made me LOL too, but I am also a horrible person, so.....

Coral said...

That is truly funny. It sounds like the hoarders line 'someone must have broken in and left this junk here'!!

Charlene ♥ NC said...

Too funny!

Jo who can't think of a clever nickname said...

haha, she's doing well having lobster!

My friend rented out her house and when the tenants moved out they had used the built in baking trays and just laid a new layer of tinfoil on top each time they got gunky so there was a "sandwich" of gunk/tinfoil many layers deep. yuck!